The short summary of a nine volume masterpiece:
I live life absurdly by poking fun at others' confusion I solely create.
Everything happens for a reason, therefore I have not a single regret.
I most definitely will judge you by your drink selection, as it encompasses your persona.
At the rate I consume twizzlers, I will be a diabetic by the age of 30.
I don't just like red stripe, it's a lifestyle.
I tend to describe unfavorable individuals as "Mariah Carey."
By far, I'm the most immaturely mature person you will ever meet.
I don't sugar coat anything besides my Starbucks soy lattes.
I love Blink182.
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